Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
