Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
