i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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