is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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