I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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