I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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