Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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