Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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