The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
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Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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