Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My hand turned me down
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Randomize
