She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
