just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize