But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Randomize
