One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
