I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
