Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I FOUND THE LEGS
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
