You're completely useless in the revolution.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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