just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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