fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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