why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
