benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize