ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
