she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Jerry, you need to find god
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
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