Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
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