I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Randomize
