I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
