you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
