Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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