okay pat passed out under dana's car
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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