It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize
