She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
this is an emotional support booty call
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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