If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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