I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
