A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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