I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Come see our sink grown plant.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
