Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
