Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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