I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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