I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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