I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize