glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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