on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
