I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
