Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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