I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
