have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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