i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I cut my penus on the lid.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
