you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
