Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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