what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
